Although it may sometimes feel like it is, life is not a race to get everything done. I know, I know: so much to do in so little time. Whether it's grocery shopping, completing assignments, grading papers, or picking up your kids from camp/school, life seems to think that we have a 48-hour day at our disposal. I have been on summer break, but it has seemed a lot more like a stay-busy-at-all-times kind of summer. I constantly have a list of things that I need to get done, but I never seem to have enough time to do it all. So, trust me: I understand why running seems like the best way to do things.
But here's the thing, we actually do have enough time to do everything that God wants us to do. God assigns/gives to us according to our ability (as described in the parable in Matthew 25:14). He knows what we can handle because He knows each of us uniquely. That means He's not giving us more to do than we can physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually handle at any given time. So why does it seem like we always have to run just to end up feeling behind? Because WE are the ones making our to-do lists and schedules! We are filling our time with meetings, errands, and events without consulting God. Have you ever asked God, "Will I be able to handle this today?" or "Is this something that you even want me to be doing?" We think that we know ourselves the best, that we know exactly what we can handle. But God, He truly knows what is best for us. His ways are not our ways, and His thoughts are not our thoughts (Isaiah 55:8-9). Society would have us believe that we always have to be on the move; God will show us that we are allowed to rest, that we are allowed to take a break, that sometimes He wants us to WAIT.
This morning, I woke up thinking about everything that was on my schedule and to-do list. I became overwhelmed and took my time getting out of bed to start my day. I ended up taking a little too long and I had to rush through my quiet time with God. I just added it to my to-do list: "spend more time with God and in His word." And then the running started: quickly get ready, call a Lyft (because I was too far behind schedule to take public transportation), get through with my appointment, grab something to eat, and on to the next destination. As I was approaching the train station, I checked my wallet for my (weekly unlimited) CharlieCard, and it wasn't there. I realized that it was in the jacket that I wore the night before. It's annoying to have to buy a ticket*, but it was alright; everything happens for a reason, right? I figured I'd just go home and grab the card. I got on the train to go home. Instinctively, I tend to check my bag for my keys, even though I know that's where I keep them. But when I checked... No keys. They were also in the jacket. So, I'm on the train and I'm frustrated with myself, like "how could you forget your CharlieCard and your keys?!?!" And I'm like "God, what are you trying to tell me? Why did You let me leave my stuff?" So what did I do? I had to WAIT.
Isn't it funny? I had to WAIT. I really didn't have much of a choice. I didn't want to use the funds on my Charlie ticket to go somewhere else because I was trying to save (not waste) money. I had to wait for my sister to get into my apartment. So it was just me and God, chillin' in the Starbucks near my apartment. And that's where this post was written. God had gotten my attention, but it was kind of a forced stop. I couldn't do anything else, so that's when I sat with God. Now, imagine if your significant other or close friend only spoke to you when they ran out of other things to do or because they were just didn't have a choice but to stop working? I'm pretty sure they would lose their title real quick. If I'm not a priority to you, why am I still here? The short answer is that: I'm not. But thanks be to God Almighty that He doesn't treat us like people do. Although He definitely does not want to be an afterthought, if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us because He knows that our flesh gets in the way (1 John 1:9). He doesn't want us to feel guilt and shame and hide from Him. He still wants us to come to Him. He wants you, yes YOU. You are his precious daughter, a jewel to His crown.
So stop running! Stop running to get everything done and stop running from God because you don't think He wants to hear from you. Trust and believe that He does. He loves you so much. That's why He had to force me to stop; I needed to be with Him at this moment. And I needed to share this with you. So take 5 minutes: for the first 4, talk to God or just sit in His presence (He'll talk to you for sure). In the last minute, look at you calendar and schedule some time every day to talk to Him. Make Him a top priority. You'll see that waiting with Him is not a detour, but a necessary stop to get your tank filled up.
Always remember that you are GRACED! Go take some time to wait with your Father.
I love you, and God loves you so much more :)
*If you're not from Boston, it costs less per ride using your Charlie Card than a ticket.
July 30, 2019
As an update, I am STILL working on this. Old habits die hard, they say. Thank God for GRACE. I made a commitment today that I would spend time in God's Word every day for the next month.
- August 22, 2019
Update, I don't think that I actually made it to September 22 with reading the Word0 daily, but I have for the last 21 days. So, I am just going to keep going for as long as I can :
- December 21, 2019